Dear 18 Year Old Ruby,

Hey darling! How's your incredibly fabulous and blessed life?? I know you're a tad bit over dramatic, condescending, and above all: a diva at heart. With that said, you're not going to like what I have to say about the next oh I don't know... Six years of your life. Don't worry. I'll give you the good news first!!

After much thought and prayer, you decide to go to BYUI. Provo seemed too big, University of Virginia kind of freaked you out, and in the end your prayers pointed to BYUI. You were obedient to that first call. You do graduate (with honors might I add) and you will use your Political Science degree. Just do me a huge favor and don't skip your Spanish 300 class until the end of the semester because the teacher does take attendance. Every Single Day. You may rock the test with a 97% but that's not good enough when 50% of your grade is attendance. Just go to freaking class. I know you would rather be sitting around and gossiping with the roommates or watching Charmed, but that C- is going to haunt you for the rest of your life. Also, you conceive a child and he is awesome. Now for the final good news, you are working in a successful career, getting opportunities to grow in other fields, and might start grad school soon. Your 25 year old self is trying to figure this out right now. I'll give you a heads up once she does. Oh and did I mention you own a restaurant and you're a really good cook??? I know! I'm so proud! PS- you don't cook in the restaurant but you do eventually learn how to cook.

On to the bad news:

You are in love with love. It's a problem. You know this and so does every guy you have crushed on for the last 14 years of your life. You will not marry your best friend. It's okay. You also have a pretty awful friendship break for like a year with him. I think you're actually going through this right now. It's cool, he comes back into your life at the perfect time. He's the best friend a girl could ask for. Also, well you didn't marry your high school love because you fall in love with another guy while this guy is gone and you... Are you ready?? YOU. RUBY ANNETTE. DECIDE. TO.GET.MARRIED. ** Just breathe... Let it sink in... I guess that's not really bad. However, the bad news is: it ends in utter destruction, like worse than any horror movie you have seen. But you get to have a baby! He's really cute. He makes the utter destruction pretty much worth it. Minus the healing your heart thing. It's going to be a long road of medication and therapists. Get ready. You're about to deal with issues you never thought possible. First things first, you're going to start dating again after the divorce. DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT go out with frat boys. You're loosing 3/3 as we speak and it's an uphill battle. They might seem really nice and attentive but don't fall for it. Also, don't blame yourself for what happens afterwards. You will. But don't.

PERSONALLY: Take it easy on the blame games. Remember that you're beautiful inside and out. Stop comparing yourself to all those wretched anorexic women on television. You're actually cute.

SCHOOL:When you decide you're ready to transfer schools: GO DO IT. DO IT FAST. I say this with love, with sadness, and with hope. I wish that I had incredible news. We are about to turn 25. It goes by so fast. I'm proud of you, for all the crazy things you did from climbing fences, tagging boys cars, swimming in forbidden lakes, kissing boys, and eating snow cones. I miss the way you live. I miss the carefree days and the happy-go-lucky Ruby that drove people crazy. I know you're not completely gone and right now I'm working my darnedest to find a piece of you. Life... It gets better by the way. Time heals all wounds because it doesn't give us any other choice. You'll be happy. Unfortunately, you're not about to graduate from law school or married to a dream guy. Heck, you're not even dating anyone but grown up Ruby has decided that she needs to take time for herself. Something you should do more often. Who cares what people think?? Grown up Ruby says take a freaking chance, go out be yourself, love yourself, be by yourself... If people love you, hurray! If they don't, dump them. You don't need negative energy in your life.

Please start taking care of your diabetes pronto, take it easy on the dates, and remember that it's okay to question everything. That's why we have a brain. When you think you're in love, take a COLD SHOWER. Trust me, you won't be thinking about anything but how awful cold water is. Do this throughout your life. When in love, cold shower first. See how you feel afterwards. Also, that Utah Jazz game is really going to haunt you for a looong time. Avoid all boys with the name Justin. Yes, even JT will disappoint you by getting married. Don't worry, it won't happen until 2012. You have time to brace yourself. Finally, the first breakup will suck super bad but by the time you get to the third, you'll be able to move on a little faster. Live your life as if you're the exception because YOU ARE UNIQUE. And you don't look half bad after having a baby. Kiss your momma and say thank you for the good genes. Kiss your siblings. Stop fighting with your dad. Stop planning for the future because it's not going anywhere. Live every day like it's "the best day ever" because your sophomore high school crush Nick (who said that all the time) can't say that anymore. He dies after you see him on NYE when you're 22. You will learn that life is fragile whether you want to or not.

XO,

almost-25-year-old Ruby